Birth of a Campaign – a one-scene play

BIRTH OF A CAMPAIGN

This is a satirical work of fiction. Except for the public figures named outright, resemblance to any actual person is purely coincidental.

SETTING: A fictional smoke-filled room

CHARACTERS: Brad, a fictional senior Republican Party strategist, and Chad, a fictional newer, younger, senior Republican Party strategist

CHAD: Dr. Ben Carson? The African-American Neurosurgeon on FOX?

BRAD: Of course!

CHAD: Isn’t he too controversial?

BRAD: Naw. Not at all. He’s perfect. You gotta think outside the box, son. A whole bunch of Democrats might vote for him just because he’s black. They do that, ya know, them liberals. Even if they don’t, they can’t criticize him because we will have one of them race cards. We will have racism immunity too, so they can’t say a word when we call a spade a spade, so to speak. Ha ha. No offense. I like you son. Nobody’s gotta worry about every little thing they say around you. You gotta have a sense of humor, ya know. But anyhow, listen up and I am going to teach you how it’s done.

CHAD: Uh, OK Brad. It’s an honor to work with you.

BRAD: *grins and pats Chad on the back* Here’s the deal. The conservative base, the teaparty, and the libertarians love the guy. The more controversial he is, the more they love him. The more the liberal media criticizes him, the more they love him. He keeps that wing of the party engaged, and he frees up the President, the future President, *laughs*, to be the moderate one. The one who will pull in the fence-sitters. It is a great combination!

CHAD: What about experience? Couldn’t this be another Palin?

BRAD: This is an entirely different situation. Besides, what’s wrong with Palin?

CHAD: How’s it different?

BRAD: Jeb is young.

CHAD: *pauses a beat. Then nods.* Ah. OK. So who is going to be the foreign policy expert?

BRAD: George and Poppy will help him. Everybody knows that.

CHAD: People hated George when he left office.

BRAD: We’ve fixed that.

CHAD: Poppy is old.

BRAD: Aw, man. He will be around until election time. If not, we will throw a fabulous, sentimental funeral, make a big fuss that outshines any official statement Obama makes. O will look like he isn’t showing enough respect and our people will call him on it. That would be OK too. The whole thing is a win-win. I’m excited!

CHAD: Genius.

KKK’s feelings are hurt at being called a hate group

So this clavern of the KKK in Virginia insists that it is not a hate group. “We are a Christian Organization,” they say.

They say that they just want their race to stay white. They say that there is nothing hateful about wanting to stay white.

Well, KKK, that depends upon what “stay white” means. You can be whatever color you want to be and nobody is stopping you. But of course you didn’t mean yourselves individually.

The problem with you is that you also want others besides yourself to “stay white.” You want your neighborhood, state, and country to stay white. You don’t want to live, eat, work, study, worship, swim, or go to the bathroom with anyone who isn’t white enough for you. And worst of all, you think that all of this should be up to you to decide, because you are white. You just assume that you should be in charge and everyone should be do things your way because you are white.

You divide society up by skin color, and you don’t see non-whites as equal citizens or equal members of society, because you don’t see them as equal human beings. You think they have only what you give them, and when they act like they are equal citizens, you get angry. Yes, you are a hate group.

If you want to “stay white,” go start your own all “white” country. I prefer to live somewhere where people come in all different shades and all have the same rights and freedoms as citizens.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/03/21/virginia-kkk-fliers_n_5008647.html

Fewer hate groups!

According to the Southern Poverty Law Center, the number of hate groups in America, while still close to a record high, went down significantly in 2013. That is great news! The bad news is that the groups that do exist are more dangerous than ever, and the threat of violence is very real. To make matters even scarier, more mainstream politicians are adopting extremist views, according to the SPLC.

I’m just wondering, are they still considered “extremist” views when they become more common? Are they “extremist” because they are uncommon? Or are they “extremist” because they are extreme? Were Hitler’s views “extremist” in WWII Germany? What do you think?

http://www.splcenter.org/get-informed/news/splc-report-far-right-extremist-groups-decline-but-remain-at-near-record-levels